Friendship

Friendship as a child is simply saying, they are my friend.  Kids are not judgmental or picky about friends.  They simply see a person and know that they want to play, so they are friends. When they fight over playing time or sharing, they simply want until the next recess and play again. It’s a simple plan with a very simple outcome. 

As adults, this becomes more convoluted.  When someone is different or sees things different than we do we don’t think that they can be our friend.  When someone’s priorities are different than ours, we see them as threatening or wrong.  When in reality these are the people that we need the most in our lives.

We need people around us that will challenge us. Those who make us think are the ones that make us grow. We all see the same world, but we see it through our own eyes and own experiences.  When we allow people around us that see the world through a different set of experiences and we share with them what we see, we learn something new.

Many of my best friends didn’t start out as friends.  We had a difference of opinion or a challenge, but by divine intervention, or circumstance we were able to see beyond the differences and realize that we are all on the same ride and the same journey.  Our paths have lead us different ways, but at any given moment we are surrounded by people by which we have something to learn. 

Some paths we cross teach us a life lesson in what not to do, some teach us compassion, pride, and love.  Some paths we join and walk a while and sometimes we need to find our own path.  As friends start to take their own path they learn new lessons and new experiences grow them.  And when your paths cross again you can learn from each other.

I challenge you to go someone an chance today that you wouldn’t normally.  Reach out to that person that has challenged you or caused you think about something outside your comfort-zone.  You will gain an experience and possibly even start a new friendship.  

One could even save a life.

Take the cookies when they are passed.

I recently read an article about a public speaking class and the things that were learned and shared.  It struck a few chords with me and I would like to share with you why.

Everyday people get up, go through the motions of life, go to bed and repeat.  Within that day, we are offered choices, obstacles and opportunity.  We shape our day and our lives by what we choose to engage in that day.  We make the choice to eat breakfast, go to work, talk to our friends, family, coworkers, stay calm, get emotional, etc.  These choices are ours.  Yes, we have expectations placed on us but our family, kids, and boss, but we have chosen to put their demands and needs in our daily lives as a priority.

Each and every day we are offered opportunities that we can choose to engage or we can let pass by.  Some things may seem trivial, and some things make us stop and think a little more.  But in reality each opportunity could be a life changing event.  No matter how big or small, these are the things that shape our lives.   

When I opened my email I could have ignored the Newsletter from our trainer, but I didn’t.  I chose to open it and read the article.  It made me stop and think about the opportunities presented to me on a daily basis.  So many times in my life, especially when I was younger, I was presented with opportunities that I passed.  They were passed on for many reasons.  I often think back on those choices and wonder where my life would be had I chosen differently.  Where would I be today had I chosen to be more focused on academics than on my social life and athletics in high school?  Because I was focused on athletics, I missed out on scholarships and getting into college.  So I didn’t go. Because I wasn’t in college, I was offered an opportunity to become a working student and train for the US Equestrian Team tryouts.  I passed on that too, even though it had been a dream of mine since I was a young child. It scared me.  I was scared of failing and scared of the success. Because I passed on my training, I was able to continue to coach.  In high school I was given the opportunity be a Junior Coach, then a volunteer coach, then an assistant coach, eventually a head coach.  It is the only thing I have never passed on. 

When an opportunity presents itself in the form of coaching, mentoring cheerleaders or coaches I rarely ever pass.  I know that in my heart, with every contact, skill and connection made, I will learn and grow.  I know that those I come into contact with will take something away from the experience.  Coaching has opened doors and opportunities for me and my life that I never thought possible.  Because of coaching I have traveled across the country, met some of my very best friends, and married the love of my life (which led to a beautiful daughter).  I have been able to see so many amazing athletes get a chance to become something they didn’t know they could.  I have witnessed kids graduate that were never expected to finish school. I have seen families joined together to support others. I have seen other coaches become successful because of my mentoring or learning from my failures. These things are all possible because whenever an opportunity presented itself, I said yes.  I always say yes and then figure out how we will make it all work. …Yes, I will come to your practice and watch.  Yes, please come to my house, we will study and learn what you need to be a well prepared coach.  Yes, I will help you coach that team.  Yes, I will help you run tryouts. Yes, please bring your team to my practice so your kids can see how we put it together.  Yes, yes, yes...  Always yes, and I always learn and gain more in my life because of those choices. 

The theme of the public speaking class was “Take the cookies when they are passed.”  The message is that when an opportunity presents itself, take it.  You never know what it will teach you, change in you, touch your heart or allow you to influence another. 

What choices did you make today? What did you pass on? What will you do today that will change your life forever?